A HEART-WRENCHING, ALMOST PANIC ATTACK, MOVED TO TEARS JUST THINKING ABOUT IT
condition. I have an overwhelming fear of either my husband dying - leaving me to raise 4 (soon to be 5) children on my own, or (I can barely think it) something happening to one of these precious little babies.
Those of you who may know me well may know that I have a wonderfully vivid imagination, but sometimes it gets a little out of hand. Even my dreams can be so vivid they seem real. Unfortunately, it has been a source of weakness, leaving me vulnerable to the enemy's attacks on my mind. I have often been left almost paralyzed by the thought process of what I would do, or where I would be if something like this happened.
But last night, I heard something wonderful, something completely freeing:
"IT IS NOT ENOUGH TO TRUST GOD TO NEVER ALLOW YOUR WORST FEAR TO HAPPEN."
We all want to say we trust God, but to what extent? I was limiting my trust in God to trusting that He would not allow those worst nightmares of mine to happen. But what if they did? Where would I be then? It would be incredibly hard for me to deal with at first, but my God is faithful and He will bring me through. He has brought me through the tough stuff before and He will do it again and again and again.
I DON'T NEED TO FEAR THE WHAT IFs BECAUSE MY GOD IS BIGGER THAN MY FEAR.
As overwhelming as my fear may seem, my God is bigger than my fear and I don't have to be afraid any more, because I can trust God even if my worst fear happens. How wonderfully freeing it is to know that regardless of what happens, I can still trust in my God to be faithful!