Free Indeed!

This poem came to me in church service this morning, during the singing portion of the service. I prayed this prayer as I sung and then spent the rest of the service writing it down.


O Holy One! Awesome Lord!
Worthy of all praise!
We sing, we stand, we dance
To You our hands we raise.
We enjoy the feelings
That come with celebration
Yet what do we do
When our hearts are torn by conviction?
Do we continue in our praise
Humbled in Your presence?
Are we brought to our knees
In light of Your holiness?
Today my eyes were open.
Today I paid attention.
Today I became vulnerable
To Your Word being spoken.
My soul cries out in anguish.
This wretched soul of mine!
Yet out of all Creation,
You have chosen to make it thine!
Why me, O Lord?
Surely, nothing have I done
To earn such bountiful grace.
Yet You of all see fit
To look upon my face
And declare freedom for my soul.
Oh yes, I am free indeed!
Then why do I bind myself
In selfish pride and self-pity?
Truth be told, I have no rights
Of which to call my own,
But you have given me the privilege
To stand before Your throne.
How do I not spend
Every moment, every breath
In complete submission
To Him who blessed me with His own death?
My heart grieves in sorrow
For how I've wounded You.
And even now after I've been forgiven,
My own ways I still often choose.
But You declare this mess that is me
Righteous. Cleansed in Your blood.
That my life may glorify You
From now until it is done.
I praise Your name
For all that You are!
For Your mercies that You have shown.
For the trials and blessings
Through which, closer to You I have grown.
Renew in me with each breath
The reality of Your love.
That my life,
Each moment,
Will reflect
The Glorious One above.